Customer service line

Sir, if may be so bold as to step-right-past your disparaging remarks regarding my visage and get right to the matter at hand, once the egg-timer has been surgically removed from the lower bowel, the manufacture’s guarantee is null and void as it constitutes a clear and present breach of the package-stated safe operating parameters. However, we thank you for your patronage and urge you to consider some of our other home and kitchen products.